The Final Destination (2009)

Directed by David R. Ellis (who did the second one).  Written by Eric Bress (who helped with the second one, but probably shouldn’t write them on his own).  Starring Bobby Campo, Shantel VanSanten, Nick Zano and Mykelti Williamson.

Plot: after a young man’s premonition of a race car accident saves a group of strangers, Death begins hunting them down

Screen-Shot-2016-04-08-at-12.54.29-PM

This is my least favorite of the franchise.  Things are just SO unbelievable and so ridiculous.  I mean, these movies are made for fun and obviously you have to suspend some beliefs, but not this many.  For instance, why would you get your car washed when your fucking sunroof is malfunctioning?  And OMG, if you’re shoe is caught in the escalator, take your foot out!!  Don’t act like you’re about to lose your whole life.  And a little lesson in biology, when you’re leg is crushed you don’t automatically start coughing up blood.  That doesn’t even make sense.  That’s like your head hurting because you cut your arm.

Wait though, I’m not done with why this was my least favorite.  The death scenes were alll well and good, so it’s a shame really that so much else was wrong.  Like the redhead being so uneven.  One minute everything’s going to be okay and the next minute they’re doomed and she’s freaking out.  And fences don’t stop cars!  And this movie doesn’t follow the rest in premise.  There’s an intervention, but no one is skipped.  Why the hell not??

And DO NOT MAKE AN X-MEN REFERENCE IF YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT!!  One thing we are serious about other than horror is comics.  And Xavier is referred to as Professor, not Doctor.  Get it right!

Things I did like…. watching the racist piece of shit get his.  The excellent opening credits. And that if everyone is going to die, at least I don’t like a one of ’em.

Drink every time the redhead contradicts herself.  But take it easy, she does it a lot.  And my favorite death scene: the last one, because it means everyone is dead.

I only gave it a 40/100.  Can you believe it?!  DJ gave it a 33.

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About TaraRomero

I suppose I could list my favorite movies here, but instead I'll give you a strange glimpse into what makes me TaraRomero. 1. When I'm alone I like to sing really loudly to songs I know really well and pretend I'm actually good at it. 2. I am a bonified Hiddlestoner. 3. I have kept a journal for the last 25 years and I still own every one of them. 4. I like ordering travel magazines and picking out trips I'm going to take when I'm rich. 5. I'm currently worrying about my brother. I always worry about my brother. He's younger and it's my job. 6. If I knew I was dying in one hour, I would type a very strange email and then go spend time with my family (including my fur babies). 7. The best non-horror movie I've seen recently is The Giant Mechanical Man. 8. I am obsessed with Bob's Burgers and I watch one episode every night before I go to bed. 9. If I had a son I'd name him Malachai (as in Christian Mythology). If I had a daughter I'd name her Antigone (as in Greek Mythology). 10. My favorite band is and I supposed always will be, Matchbox Twenty. However, the music has become more upbeat lately and I don't like it as much. Just being honest.
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